Bad times...

I came back from my trip to NY and went to Utah to visit my brother Lucien for his birthday, watch my brother Charles graduate from BYU, and deposit my brother Lawrence at the MTC. I also climbed a mountain, an accomplishment I was excited to share. But the night I got back from my trip, a dear friend passed away. I was too consumed with funeral preparations, etc., that blogging about my Utah trip was the last thing I wanted to do. Ever since, things have been rough. I just haven't felt much like sharing the depressing details of my life. But, I am feeling better and so I revisit the blogosphere. All of the pictures were taken on my phone, so sorry they aren't great.

These were taken when we went to visit Lucien for his eleventh birthday. It was a wonderful day. I miss him a lot, but, hopefully, this time, though hard, is the right investment for his future.




This is what my feet looked like after climbing the mountain. I was wearing socks and tennis shoes the whole time.

Here's Dad, on the way down, with some lovely flowers. They were everywhere and every color. Amazing.

We saw lots of these guys, too.

I took this picture the moment I reached the saddle. I guess I'm kind of a namby pamby, but I started crying. I hiked from the lake to the summit alone, and before that, my brother and I got lost on the Aspen Grove face of the mountain. We had to climb straight up, through unbelievable and nearly impassable growth, in order to (after an hour) find the trail again. (During the adventure, I experienced a free fall, and what it feels like to grab a thorny bush and have to pull all of your body weight up with thorns digging into your flesh.) So, when I got to the saddle, I was exhausted, alone, and a little traumatized. But when I saw this, it all became worth it. I realized in that instant why prophets climbed mountains.


Just a couple other fun things. I was having trouble with the setting on my engagement ring, so I was able to have it completely rebuilt. You probably can't tell from the picture (being from my phone), but it actually looks a lot different. I like it. It's lovely.


As you probably know, I want to have children more than anything in the world. But, that's just not been in the cards for me. I want children so badly that I daydream sometimes about finding an abandoned baby and being allowed to keep it, or about someone leaving a baby on my doorstep. So, I was surprised a few weeks ago to come home to this.


And finally, can you believe I wore this get-up to church. I did.

Stories

Evelyn LOVES books. It could be worse. She could be addicted to TV or food or drugs. Anyway, we have read LOTS of books. Today we read a book called, "Little Toot," by Hardie Gramatky. It's not what you think. It was published in 1939 and is the story of a self-conscious tugboat. I found it quite the historical treat given my modern perspective on politics and environmentalism, and the fanatical and trendy green movement going on right now. (Don't get me started.) I offer you a little sample.





That's right. This is the heartwarming tale of Little Toot, who, despite being embarrassed by his little toot, can at least be proud of his smokestacks. And yes, in the end, he saves the day with his emissions. Now-a-days, you couldn't get a publisher to touch that with a 10 foot pole.

Confession

Before I begin, let me be clear. I feel REALLY bad about this. Even though I couldn't have for seen it or done anything to prevent it, it happened on my watch and I can't make it better. Evelyn has a lot of big plastic toys. Yesterday, she had one in the living room. She stood up and picked the toy up by its handle and looked like she was going to take it back in her room. At the last second, she decided to swing the massive plastic toy up over her head and it slammed into the wall to the right side of the door frame. The dent is pretty bad. I couldn't get mad at her because it was an accident, but we went to the wall and talked about how the wall got an owie and how we have to be more careful with our toys because wall owies make Mommy very sad. She must have been listening because when we read "Olivia," she points to this picture and says, "Wall, owie."

Evelyn and Careen Party 3

We woke up at 8 again today. We took our time this morning and left the house around 10:30-11. We went to a different playground so we could swing and so I wouldn't buy anymore cupcakes. It was lots of fun, and I was trying to be a good aunty and indulge my niece a bit. I let her stay for a really long time. (Almost an hour on the swings.) But it turns out I did her a disservice. I learned today, and should have learned yesterday, that hunger is a major tantrum trigger for Evelyn, and we were VERY late for lunch. Everyone is grumpy when they are hungry. I can't blame her. But we had a really hard time getting in the stroller and trying to walk down the sidewalk with me trying to protect her from her head banging. Once we got to the store, she cheered up. We bought some frozen french "fries" to bake for dinner and finally got some whole milk. After naps, we watched Sesame Street and had snacks. We also had a bath. Bath was interesting. She pooped in the water, and it was pretty soft...if you know what I mean. I seriously don't know how she makes that much poop. But, at least she's regular. It was made somewhat comedic by her commentary. As she stood there, she said, "POOPing!" Then when I pulled her out, she pointed to the water and said, "Clean it." Then as I did, she said, "Gross, gross. Gross." After dinner (don't worry, Emma, she was tired of the fries after like 8 of them) I realized that this was Evelyn's last chance to go get ice cream before Mommy and Daddy come home. So, we took wet curls, OU jammies, monkey, baby, and bib to McDonald's and "shared" a hot fudge sundae. (You can worry about that a little, Emma, since I only got a couple of bites.) Needless to say, I didn't put much in her evening milk cup. I'm surprised she was able to drink any at all. Now she is sleeping peacefully in her bed.

Yesterday...

I forgot this funny story from yesterday. Evelyn was eating applesauce and said,

"Hot, hot."

I said, "No, it's normal. Not hot, not cold...normal."

"Normal...Laurel!!!"

"Normal sounds like Laurel, doesn't it. Maybe Laurel will come visit soon."

"Nonna!!!"

"No, Nonna can't come visit. Nonna has to stay at Nonna's house."

"Buh-bye, house."

Evelyn and Careen Party 2, cont.

We had a cupcake after dinner and then Evelyn had some 1% milk. We didn't make it out again for the whole. Maybe tomorrow. Evelyn went to bed on time and, again, silently. She is now sleeping soundly. If you haven't sat in a rocking chair in a dark room with a 2-year-old snuggled up with you and sung "I Am a Child of God," "I Love to See the Temple," "Love is Spoken Here," and "A Child's Prayer," you should try it. The songs will take on a whole new meaning and you will be so overcome with emotion that you may even tear up a bit. I am very grateful to my parents for teaching me the simple and fundamental truths expressed in those songs. I remember my mother singing them to me when I was very small, and I look forward to singing them to my own children. But for now, I am grateful just to be able to sing them to Evelyn.

Evelyn and Careen Party 2

This morning we woke up at 8:00. We hung out a while, ate breakfast, and then decided to try to go do boats and store since we didn't get to yesterday. We made it to boats. There were LOTS of boats. There were even kayaks and a swimmer. We chased birds and pushed the little pink stroller. Then we decided we wanted to go to a playground. So we walked to 90th and 2nd. We had lots of fun there. Evelyn's favorite part was stealing another child's ball and playing "fetch" with herself. Then, on the way home for lunch, we decided to get some cupcakes since we walked RIGHT past Two Little Red Hens. Unfortunately, Evelyn (for no apparent reason...she wasn't mad) threw her corn on the floor when she was done. I explained that "we don't throw food at this house" and that I couldn't give her any cupcake unless she said she was sorry. I held it in front of her for a long time, trying to coax an apology from her so we could share a cupcake, but she would just NOT say the word "sorry." So I put the cupcake away and cleaned her up for nap time. She didn't seem torn up about it, even though she said a million times that she wanted to cake I had in my hand. Oh, well. Maybe we can have cupcakes later.

Nap time went well. Evelyn went down w/o screaming, and slept for a full hour. Then she played by herself in the dark for another 45 minutes or so. I cleaned the apartment and we left at about 3:30 since the realtor was coming over for a showing. We thought it would be fun to go to Barnes and Noble, read stories, and play with the trains. I looked it up on my phone and walked 1.5 miles only to find there was not a B&N there. So, I looked it up again, only to be told to go back to 3 blocks from home. By the time we got to the second destination and discovered that there was also no B&N there, we were both pretty angry. Can you blame us? I walked 3 miles for no reason, and Evelyn had to sit in her stroller for 1.5 hours for no reason. We decided to go to the store and then go home to watch signing time. BUT, the store had NO whole milk. We are home now, watching signing time and getting ready to go back out again to get milk. Oh, boy. I think I need a cupcake.